In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Nightmares.”
I guess my nightmares could be described as kind of boring and simple. The last uncomfortable dream that I had was maybe a couple of weeks ago and involved me trying to re-connect with a lost friend of mine and having it fail massively. I have this dream every few weeks, since I lost the friendship about a year ago. Another dream that I have repeatedly over the past year that is sometimes mixed with this friend dream involves Home Depot, where I worked for a year and a half.
The friend dream usually goes along the lines of us running into each other unexpectedly, me getting ignored by her, me attempting to talk to her and understand why she stopped talking to me and having that fail, etc. I hate how clingy and desperate admitting this makes me seem, but I do truly feel like I’m not the crazy one here… Who hangs out with someone every day and says they’re best friends and then one day just stops responding to messages/phone calls/texts, everything?
The Home Depot dream, I have had literally over a dozen times in the past year, and usually involves me going back to work there casually as they really needed help, the shift going extremely badly, and then me walking out and realising I will never go back.
What do I think these dreams mean? I think they show how I put all of myself into everything that I do, and when it’s not returned to me or it fails somehow, I find it very difficult to let go. I do not allow many people into my life or my mind, I do not have many friends, and I have not had many jobs. I am learning that nothing lasts forever, that people, jobs, situations, etc, will come in and out of my life forever and instead of clinging to the memories of what was, I need to focus on what they all brought me, acknowledge their gifts, and then move on.